I got a sudden itch to update my blog! :P

Hello, everyone! I know it's been awhile again! :P
If you can't remember who I am,-my name is Rachel, Rachel Heyworth, soon to be Rachel Wegner! :D I like the sound of that- mostly because it would mean that I then would be Ryan's wife!

Things have been interesting lately, I have so many weird emotions that I've never experienced before.-I don't even know how to define them, or where to place them, or where they even came from. haha, Yeah I know, confusing. :P Like I'm very ready to get married, I don't feel like I belong anywhere else apart from Ryan, but at the same time, I know, that once I marry, that's a whole new life right there. Like, the life I always new (and loved) is gone, done, over with! And a new half is just beginning. It will be wonderful, I know! But it's also (don't get me wrong) but kinda scary too. Suddenly your the wife and mother that you've only watched all the other women being, all your life. -And your wide open to making mistakes that could mean a whole lot more than it did before, when you were just kinda more in the back ground. And even knowing that there's just so much more that I can't even comprehend at the moment is quite sobering, and scary. But I do know with all my heart, that I love Ryan, haha I love him so much it almost hurts. I can go crazy sometimes with how much i love him, because I know that he loves me very much- but I sometimes fear that I'll lose him, I know I won't. But I don't want to, and the thought of it kills. I know I'm not going to lose him at all, he is such a wonderful guy, he loves deeply, and I can rest in that. And Jesus, He has been telling me lately to trust, just trust, and be anxious for nothing! "Trust me" I feel like Peter you know, when he walks on the water towards Jesus, but along the way he got distracted by the danger surrounding him, the big waves and the wind. When he took his eyes off from Jesus, he started sinking. He cried out to Jesus, and Jesus pulled him back up. I do that in life so many times, I start out all eager, and ready to get to Jesus, to know Him more, to reach out and touch him, but through this life's process, I get scared of everything that could happen, or just simply feel like I'm never going to get there, and stop trying for a while. But Jesus, His love is so great, that He pulls me back up out of the water. -Puts me back onto my feet and faces me towards that big scary world again, and tells me not to worry, He's here with me, and He'll catch me when I fall, show love, when I need His love, correct me justly when I've disobeyed His word, and show an overflow of His mercy! All because He loves me, and His love will never let us go! And if He started a good work in you, He'll be faithful to complete it! I want to live for Jesus Christ! And I know Ryan does. I look forward to our life's journey toward holiness, and love together. Together we'll follow Christ, and face the world, together! I thank God for meeting my need and bringing a friend and companion whom I will soon be able to call, even, my husband. I thank Him for allowing Ryan into my life. Jesus saw the need, and provided a wonderful man for me. I thank God for blessing me with a good home, my parents loved me enough to take the time out and teach me the Lord's ways; and to listen, and hear for His sweet voice. My parents are such good parents. I owe them so much, but have a tendency to push that aside. But it's too great, and important to me to not tell you all how wonderful they've been to me, and still are. I sometimes take it for granted (outwardly, I really don't inside) that my parents are always going to be there, because you know, they are. They've been there all my life, but I had an empty thought, that, someday (Lord willing, very far away) they're NOT going to be there. That's terrible to think of! I want to bless, and be a blessing to my parents, the way they have me, all these years. I want them to know, that I really appreciate them. Not just assume our roles, I'm their daughter they're the parents, of course they know I love them. No, they need to hear it, and see it. I want to show it more. If you guys want to remind me of that from time to time that would be great! Here are some verses I keep coming across lately:

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.
And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.
The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you."
"Think on these things"... Jesus holds us all in the palm of His hand. He's with us for always. I want to honor Him and be a servant of His. With His help, I will. And i am so thankful for everything He has given me, and everyone! If your in my life, know that i do love you. Way more importantly, know that Jesus loves you so much, and desires that we love and honor Him! Listen for that still sweet voice that calms the sea, And know that He is God, our Father! Listen. Think lovely thoughts, Think Jesus. Live for Him! Make it a point to talk to Him through-out the day, He wants that we would consider Him our best friend.
Sorry for being kinda random. I feel better now, anyway :D